
From: Darth Vader, Dark Lord of the Sith
To: The Cold, Uncaring Universe
Re: NOOOOO!!!!!!
In this classified Imperial memo, Star Wars anti-hero Darth Vader implores the Universe to answer his forceful denial of loss.
Excerpt of the memo:
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Please observe the extended use of the letter “o,” which denotes the length of the shout, and the excessive use of the exclamation point, which signifies the shout’s awesome volume and power. I should also remind you that I held my arms out like Celine Dion when I produced the cry, lending a visual flair that I think adequately conveyed my pain and anguish. And again, I will remind you, my emotion was so powerful that shit vibrated and blew up. People tend to find that kind of thing impressive. Most impressive.
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